Communication & Conflict

Last week our blog talked about creating a culture of respect. One of the key ways for doing so is to focus on making sure that less wrongdoing—or conflict—is occurring in the workplace. That’s where communication comes in.

Consider the CEO who is very approachable—walking around, talking with people in all departments and asking “What can I do better?” They know that inviting feedback makes them vulnerable, but nevertheless expects the leadership team to do the same—engage in honest feedback and dialogue.

How do you foster such a “speak-up” culture where everyone embraces accountability?  What makes good communication?

It starts with good listening, an active process that’s not just being quiet until the other person stops talking so you can say what you think.  Good listeners interact with the speaker to ask questions.  Good listeners watch for verbal cues while processing the words they’re hearing.  Good listeners listen for what’s not being said—some call this “listening for the music and not just the words.” Listening is at the very heart of effective conversations which leads to good communication. 

An effective conversation is the free flow and exchange of information and ideas—where people openly and honestly express opinions, share feelings, and articulate theories willingly, even when ideas and theories are controversial or unpopular. People involved are aware of what’s happening and what’s being said. Good conversation uses the following skills—all of which require good listening:

  • Attending skills to convey acknowledgement and recognition and to establish ease.

  • Encouraging skills to help elaborate on thoughts or feelings.

  • Clarifying skills to reduce ambiguity and establish clarity.

  • Reflecting skills to restate, in your own words, what the other person is saying.

In the case of our CEO, they communicate often. They make sure that the feedback is listened to, acknowledged, and acted upon. When an idea or suggestion is not feasible, they explain why.

Most importantly, this CEO discusses expectations, describing what needs to happen including when and why.

When expectations are clear, the likelihood of conflict arising diminishes. Rather than waste time and energy being confused and frustrated, employees have a clear path to follow. They know that they can and are expected to bring unforeseen issues to anyone in management as early as possible so adjustments can be made.  

Embedded in the organization’s values are trust and respect for all. They achieve this by expecting active employee participation in issues, mutual problem solving and goal setting, and transparency. People are not afraid to engage in dialogue, question goals, tasks or expectations, nor ask for clarification. 

An open, speak-up culture that encourages feedback and accountability will engage, motivate and retain good talent—a goal every organization should strive to achieve.

Two resources that we offer our readers to achieve such a culture are The Essential Workplace Conflict Handbook, a guide for resolving disputes and increasing productivity and The Conflict Resolution Phrase Book with over 2,000 phrases to use in difficult situations.

 

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